Day One Thousand and Seventy-Six

The First Lie

So, back on Day 1,019…

I lied when I said I was starting Paleo again.

There ain't no way this mama could commit like that.

(Liar, liar pants on fire!)

When they tell you about food aversions and food cravings during pregnancy, it's real life. Really real life. Like, I can't eat my morning eggs and bacon real life. Shut the front door. Me? No eggs and bacon? I've had the same breakfast for over a year, and now the thought of it makes me want to projectile vomit. (Same with cooked broccoli, chicken, and any kind of salad. Ew, get out of my head!) 

*Shiver*

 Seriously though. All I want anymore is a piece of toast (buttered on one side, cooked on one side - not in the toaster) with some honey drizzled over it, a banana, and cottage cheese (fat free, from Whole Foods) with some pineapple in it. Very specific, I know. Coming from a girl who doesn't eat bread and who's tummy can't handle dairy. Go figure.

Truth is, I lied because I needed an escape plan. All the girls in NOLA would surely find me out if I passed on a glass of wine every single night at dinner or at the game. I had to think of something fast, so, I blamed Paleo, and made my new, stricter diet "official" on my blog. Mwahaha! That also gave me the perfect excuse to photograph my very first pregnancy silhouette. 

I'm sneaky and I know it. 

(That was week three!)

Fast forward 10 weeks, and here I am now (well, yesterday).

I've taken a picture every week since we found out, and…still waiting on this whole "bump" thing to happen. Maybe I'm showing a little(?), but I heard that since I'm tall, it might take a while for my belly to really get out there…which is probably a good thing since I'll be in a wedding in a month and I'd like to not have to wear pants with my cute, short pink dress. I think the bride might appreciate it too.

So far, this pregnancy has been a great experience. 

I haven't had any morning sickness - thank you Jesus! - and I haven't felt like eating an entire horse. Both wins in my book.

The only thing that's really bothered me is how unbelievably tired I am, and how lazy it makes me feel that I have to take a nap every single day. I'm serious. I can't keep my eyes open come 3PM. It's just not an option. Also, I have these crazy food aversions - including hating toothpaste - that are just bizarre. Like, it sickens me to brush my teeth. Oh my gosh, IT'S HORRIBLE. I don't know what's worse, having to actually brush my teeth, or the guilty, disgusting feeling I'd get if I somehow talked myself into not brushing them at all. Ewwwwww!

And maybe the only other downside (besides the constipation, which I'll spare you the gory details), is how unbelievably cold I am. Like, freezing to death, North Pole, hypothermia kind of cold. I went out for my sister's bachelorette party in Washington just a couple weeks ago. Guys, it was seventy degrees outside at like midnight and I was cuddled up by a fancy fire, shivering my tail off for an entire hour. My goosebumps never went away! Next to a fire! What is this?! I sit in my 76-78 degree condo every day with sweats, a sweatshirt, socks and a blanket at all times. It's absurd. Good thing five steps away is my front door…and full access to perpetual summer and cozy humidity. For real. I'm loving the humidity. It's like an extra blanket. Maybe the baby is trying to tell us something? Oh, never leave Florida, Baby Con, is that what you're saying??? ;)

Dude, we're really having a kid.