Day Five Hundred and Eighty-Three

The Day Baseball Broke My Little Heart

There's not much room in my life for complaints. 

I have just about everything I could ever want. Well, besides a puppy, a baby, and maybe closer proximity to my family. Other than that, I've been blessed beyond my wildest dreams. And I'm so incredibly grateful for the life I've been given.

But yesterday, baseball broke my heart. 

If you know anything about me, you know me to be a (ultra) sensitive woman. I'm emotional. I am. It's true! Ya got me. And when I get my hopes up, just forget it. I'll guarantee cry the entire day. And that's exactly what I did. Clearly, my bag was packed. The condo was spotless. And I was ready to make the 5 1/2 hour trek directly West to Pensacola, FL for two nights. Adam and I made arrangements before he went on this first 10-day trip, that we'd see each other on Tuesday in Pensacola. It's the closest away team in this league (so ridiculous), making it one of the only trips I can travel to when he leaves. I was sitting on my counter in the bathroom (yes, I sit on my counter to do my makeup) when Adam called 20 MINUTES before I was leaving to say that there was a HUGE misunderstanding. Ok. Hit me with it. Apparently, the Southern League doesn't work like the Florida or Sally Leagues. Last year, we were able to purchase hotel rooms for half of the team rate, which came out to be somewhere around $40/night. I guess they don't do that in AA. Or something? Because he was told that actually, they couldn't give him a team rate and had to charge him full price for a room: $160. He said the words and the tears came gushing from my eyes. Snot everywhere. The trip was already going to cost us at least $240 (kill me) because of our disgusting beast of a gas tank. Add on another $300 for a room...and the answer was simple. All ready to leave, and nowhere to go...because no one in their right mind would pay almost $600 for a two-day trip to watch a baseball game. 

It wouldn't have been so bad if I had expected all along to be in Jacksonville for the entire series. But that wasn't the case. I was so looking forward to seeing my husband. It's the longest we've been apart in, gosh, 6 months. And when the prospect of getting to see him got ripped right from me, I just broke down. Not only was I to miss another start, but I was going to miss him. So, yesterday, I was pathetic. And embarrassing. And maybe one of these days I'll learn how to handle the aftermath of getting your hopes robbed from you. 

There's a lesson in all this that I know the Lord has for me. And in time, I know I'll be able appreciate it. But for now, I'm just really sad. I do love what my husband does. It's his passion and his calling and he's been given this opportunity for a reason. And because I love him so, I'm willing to serve him in any way possible. And I want to. It's just really hard for me sometimes.